the Phoenix

I had the scariest experience of my 32 years of life today.  Every year, Roger Beasley gives its employees a turkey.  Most of the time, it's precooked or smoked, and such was the case today.  I have thawed this past Christmas' turkey and got it out to cook today.  My first mistake was to try to prep the turkey during my break at work.  I have no roaster, but I have a rotisserie.  I LOVE my rotisserie.  I have used it for everything from kabobs to vegetables to chicken thigh pieces that are occasionally on sale at HEB for $1/lb.  I am well-versed in its form and function.  I stabbed the turkey, placed it in the rotisserie, turned it on and went back to work 5 minutes late.  I smelled a funny smell about 10 minutes later that I couldn't really identify.  I put myself on personal to stop my calls, finished my current call and went into the kitchen to check it out.  As I came down the hall, I saw a lot of smoke coming from the counter.  As I entered the kitchen, I saw the flames coming out the front of the machine!  The legs of the bird had worked themselves loose and fallen against the element.  The juices had caught fire!  I turned it off and threw flour into the machine and all over the bird.  My dinner had officially gone down in flames.  After the smoke cleared, I took the bird out of the rotisserie and tried to figure out something else for dinner.  First, I had to finish work.  For the next hour, I agonized over what to do.  I got the idea to figure out if I could save ANY of the turkey.  After work, I peeled off the blackened skin and found, to my surprise, the meat was still usable!  Hallelujah!  I dismembered the bird so that it would fit in 2 9x13 pans in my oven.  My turkey went down in flames and rose again as an edible dinner!  YEA!